Time to Rise
What Tony Robbins Taught Me About Breakthroughs, Identity, and Relationships
Earlier this year, I attended a virtual Tony Robbins summit called Time to Rise.
Here are my notes and takeaways:
Day One
“I’m a procrastinator.”
No, your procrastination is a habit, which you can change.
3 Core Skills:
Pattern recognition - lessens fear because history moves in seasons
Pattern utilization
Pattern creation
We don’t experience life. We experience the life we focus on.
The quality of your life depends on the quality of your emotions. You don't want things (relationships), you want feelings (love).
3 Mandates of Leadership
See it as it is, but not worse than it is
See it better than it is
Make it the way you see it
Energy is power. It needs to be high. Happy people get happier. Depressed people become more depressed. Energy affects every aspect of your life. It’s the most important thing needed to make a change.
Creating a Breakthrough or Transformation
A breakthrough is a moment in time when everything changes, when what seems impossible becomes possible, and you act on it.
Reflection prompts:
What triggers a breakthrough? (A new experience, strategy, insight, etc.)
What’s an area you struggled with and you finally broke through?
What triggered it?
What made the moment a must, not a should?
What made it possible for that change to last?
What’s the pattern?
Example (my own):
Breakthrough: Leaving JPMorgan
Moment that changed it all: Belief from other people, going all in on Ironman Texas and qualifying for Kona, realizing that it was reversible and worst case wasn’t that bad
What made it last: Less stress, levity, joy, purpose
If you want to be a hero, you have to serve. “Servo” in Latin means to serve, protect or watch over.
3 Keys to a Breakthrough
(Steps to take when you’re not getting what you want)
Strategy - least important
Story - a limiting set of beliefs
Everything in life happens for a reason, but you have to find the purpose. (I, Adam, don’t actually believe this, but I get the point). Your worst day can become the best day.
Change your story, change your life. Be the victor, not the victim. Make it empowering.
Divorce the story of limitation and marry the truth of your true potential, ability, and skill. Don’t go back—cut it off.
If you have the right story, you’ll figure out the right strategy
State - mental, emotional, physical - must come first
Your state controls your story
Strategy is worthless without the right story and state
The fastest way to change your state is to change your body, not your mind. Start with physiology, then psychology.
Power Postures & Archetypes
Incorporate power postures:
Standing like Superman for two minutes increases testosterone, decreases cortisol, and boosts risk tolerance
Screaming “YES!” and pounding your chest
We all have different personalities, parts of ourselves, and archetypes. Let them work together. What would they say to each other? What advice are they giving?
Warrior
Magician
Lover
Sovereign
Old story: enough is never enough. I’m not good enough.
New story: I am enough. I am capable. I am bold. I take risks. I am scared and do it anyway.
Courage can change your life.
Day Two
Part I - Identity
A new story only has impact if a new state comes with it.
Identity is a form of belief. A belief is a feeling of certainty about what something means. Your belief about a person is more powerful than their behavior. A belief is a poor substitute for an experience.
Identity is the most powerful belief of all. It’s what shapes what we do and feel. It shapes your story. It’s the most powerful force in the human personality. That force is the need to stay consistent with how we define ourselves.
Beliefs create or destroy. We know our identity by who we are or who we are not:
Want a cigarette?
No, I’m not a smoker.
People don’t buy products, they buy identities. A $500 Louis Vuitton bag costs $40 to make and does the same thing as something you can buy at Kmart for $19.
Whatever you attach to the words “I am”, with enough intensity and consistency, you will become.
Remember our procrastinator example from the beginning? “I’m just one of those,” people say. You’ll look to find support and evidence for it.
The way we judge our identity is by our consistent actions; however, we must separate our behavior from who we are as no one is perfect or always consistent.
Stand with a feeling of total certainty, but understand affirmation without discipline is the beginning of delusion.
5 Steps to Creating a Unique Brand and Identity
Understand the true power of identity
“Coke” when you want cola, “Google it”
Identify and articulate your competitive advantage
Amazon sells convenience. Tell it quickly, specifically, and clearly. I’m the guy that was hit by a car that rebuilt himself and helps others do the same.
Practice communicating congruently
Live it
Market it
Add value. Do more for others than anyone else does. You can charge more as a result. Build a brand. People will seek you out. “Robbins = results”
“Why should I do business with you vs someone else? Why should I hire you? What will you give me? What’s your unique benefit?”
Tell and sell the benefit, not the process, and why you can give it to them.
Endurance sport saved my life, shattered my limiting beliefs, and has given me the ability to accomplish more than I ever thought possible. I want to give that gift to others.
Part II - Relationships
The law of familiarity implies that if you’re around anything enough, you tend to take it for granted.
90% of success in a relationship is selection. It’s the most important decision—not only who you partner with, but who you bring yourself.
Expectations kill intimacy and joy. We all see the world differently. Trade expectation for appreciation.
The reason you’re attracted to them is because they have something that you want but the reason you want it is because it’s already inside you, but you may not be expressing it.
Something you used to find attractive may become something that bothers you (i.e. someone who is proactive and takes charge may become someone too assertive and domineering).
To Not Argue but Still Be Authentic:
Use Dr. Julie Colwell’s S.E.W. framework:
S.E.W. is an acronym for the three things you want to communicate. “Right now I’m feeling…”
Sensations - in your body, not story
Emotions - sad, mad/angry, scared/fearful, glad/happy/loving, excited/surprised/aroused
Wants - or don’t want (this is what most people miss or don’t communicate)
There shouldn’t be an argument if what you communicate is not arguable.
The wall that protects you also imprisons you.
Assignment/Reflection:
What’s your old identity?
What’s your new identity?
How can you expand it in 2025 to change your life?
Did you attend the Time to Rise Summit? If so, what were your biggest takeaways? If you caught day three, I’d love to hear what you learned and what I missed.
P.S. Happy 72nd birthday, Dad. I love you, Babu.
We can't keep living in our own world. What goes inside our head matters more than we know.
Take for example- I am not good at playing guitar. How can I say so? If I haven't tried playing guitar even for once, how can I judge. And even if I have started for a month or so, I will straight hop to how much better I have got & if I haven't gotten much improvement then I will straight away say there is no point in pursuing this further. This goes with in every walk of life. We want everything in a timeline of a snap of a finger.
How much of our thoughts have been ours? From birth it has been moulded to fit into society, it goes with almost everyone. Some try to question things around them. We all become look a like not physically but mentally. We need to invert and question our immediate environment just to know how much of limiting beliefs we are surrounded with.